Friday, August 29, 2014
We've been here before
Over the years I've done a few posts like this one. I don't know if they are remembrance posts, or good-bye posts. I also don't know if the distinction matters.
Its never fun.
This one took me a bit of time to get around to, for a number of reasons. The night I heard she had entered hospital for the second time and had a terrible prognosis I grabbed a camera and went walking through the neighborhood. Throwing yourself into a craft can erase thoughts for a while, but it didn't work this time. I managed a few things like this. Subject sucks, colors are pretty.
My grandmother was the last living grand parent that I had. I no longer have a direct link to that generation. That is the kind of thing that begs for attention. And when I started thinking about it, really thinking about, I felt just how little time we have, not just as individuals, but as continuing line of living family. Its short. Great grandparents are about the limit, and even then there is so little overlap with youngest generation in terms of time together. Kathryn had 12 years with at least one great grandparent, Tobias had 8.
My grandmother is one of the most gracious people I knew. She had to be. She raised 6 boys. Six. She also put up with my grandfather ( he'd agree with me, that this is probably her crowning achievement ). She was also patient. Again, I shall point to the above. However, it was also shown in how she spent some of her leisure time. She built a dollhouse. She built it essentially from sticks and glue. There were no pre-fabbed walls, or floors or frames. Its huge. It took FOREVER. I remember this pretty well because she built it using their pool table as a work surface, and it was many, many, many, many visits of no billiards. But, there was always progress being made on the doll house.
When she felt you would listen she would give good advice. And when she felt it unnecessary she might have thought good advice, but held it back. During one of the last few visits I had with her this filter wasn't in place. As I was leaving that night I told her when I would come back in to see her. She said that sounded good, and advised me not to stop at any strange women's houses on the way.
This is good advice.
I will follow it the rest of my journey through this life.
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